


Let's Get Tricky

by Sing_Melokia



Series: The Snow of the Free Marches [5]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 15:22:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16935732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sing_Melokia/pseuds/Sing_Melokia
Summary: Melokia and Onyvr test out a new idea for Josephine but they can't help having some fun with it.





	Let's Get Tricky

**Author's Note:**

> This is set before Melokia finds out that she's pregnant. I thought of this after writing the previous chapter. It's going to bug me that it's out of order but I guess I'll just have to learn to live with it.
> 
> Edit: I couldn't look at the spelling mistakes any longer. Stupid tablets and their dumb auto correcting features. Krem is a word.

"Come on. It'll be fun," Whined Melokia. "Its actually Josephine's idea. She wants to see if it'll work on the nobles when I'm not available to meet with them. Plus, I'm bored and I want to do something interesting."

Melokia knelt at Onyvr's feet, pleading with the best puppy dog eyes she could muster. The dirt from the Skyhold garden stained her clothes. Onyvr sighed and sat down next to his twin. His medical herb garden lay in front of them. A riot of colours from the different plants Melokia had collected on her travels, grew happily under Onyvr's care. He was glad that his healing abilities were valuable to the Inquisition. But it also sadden him that they were in such high demand. Melokia sat quietly as she watched her brother continue to water his garden. She could tell that he was going over all the pros and cons of her idea.

"If I agree to do this, I want something in return." He started saying, before Melokia's excited squeal cut him off.

"Whatever you want, consider it yours!" Melokia agreed eagerly. 

"You haven't even heard what it is yet." Onyvr couldn't help but laugh at her excitement. "What if I wanted a Griffon or a baby Dragon? How would you go about getting that?"

"Pfft," Melokia waved her marked hand dismissively. "I'm the Inquisitor. I'm sure my advisors would find a way to keep me happy."

"I want a Fennec fox. And not one of those dull grey ones Dorian keeps ranting about. One with some colour and character. Also, all the things it would need to live comfortably here."

"It's a gift for Dorian, isn't it? I know how much he adores those foxes. He keeps begging me to bring one back whenever we see them." Melokia smiled at Onyvr. "Fine. Consider it done. You're lucky I love you both. Now, let's go. This is going to be great." Melokia stood and dusted off her pants. Onyvr copied and followed his sister to her quarters. 

*****

"Almost done, me dear. Please stop fidgeting." Vivienne scolded Onyvr into stillness. Onyvr rolled his eyes at Melokia, who was going through the same process with Josephine. The doors to her balcony stood open, letting the mountain air into the room. Sunlight pours in, making the room look inviting and bright. Articles of clothing litter the floor and bed, having been discarded, in lieu of the outfits the twins now wear. 

"I believe we are done," Josephine announces with flair. "It truly is uncanny how much you two look alike. And if this works, it will be a massive asset in gaining allies quickly."

"I have to agree, Lady Montiylet. To be able to not keep the nobility waiting will be very handy indeed." Concurred Vivienne. "Now, come tell us what you think."

The pair guided Melokia and Onyvr to her full length mirror so they can check out their handiwork. Their mouths drop open in amazement. Each of them were wearing matching outfits, shoes and gloves. The comfortable outfit, Josephine had deemed fit for the status on Inquisitor, suited Onyvr well. The gloves hid the fact that there was no green anchor upon his palm. The dragonscale jacket accentuated their slender frames. They had even stuffed Onyvr's shirt so it appeared that he had breasts. Which felt odd to him but was necessary for their plan to work. Each of their hairstyles now donned the same braids down each side. Luckily, Melokia's and Onyvr's snow white hair was the same length, which made styling it all the more simple. Other than the slight height difference, they were identical. 

"This is amazing," Melokia exclaimed. "It's like I'm talking to myself. Hello me." She waved at Onvyr as he laughed at her. 

"Unfortunately for me, I won't be able to talk. It's the only thing that would give me away. Shall we go see if it works?" They turned in tandem to face Josephine and Vivienne and gave them matching smiles. 

"A trial run would be a good idea. We will need to know if we have to make any adjustments before trying it out for real." Josephine agreed with the twins. 

"Excellent. Let's go Onyvr. I have a plan." Melokia grabbed a hold of her brother's hand and dragged him to the staircase. "I'll go through the servant's corridors and meet you at The Heralds Rest. I'll tell you the plan when we met up." Giggling to herself, the Inquisitor pulled her brother down the stairs. 

Vivienne looked nervously at Josephine, "Why do I have a bad feeling about this?"

*****

As Onyvr made his way to the tavern, he learnt just how much the people of the Inquisition relied and looked up to his sister. Due to his disguise, he was greeted with hellos, waves and 'Inquisitor's the entire way. Not to blow his cover, he just nodded and smiled back at them. To have to go through this every day must get tedious and tiring. He decided he would have to do something for his sister. Just to remind her that she needs a rest too. 

Once Onyvr made it to The Heralds Rest, he started to look for his twin. Allowing his eyes to adjust to the dim tavern, he looked over towards the bar. Spotting Melokia hiding behind the staff door, he discreetly made his way over. Melokia put a finger to her lips and gestured him inside. Careful not to be seen, Onyvr ducked in after her. 

"Ok, who do you reckon first? Bull or Sera?"

Onyvr thought for a second, "Let's start with Bull. What do you propose we do?"

Melokia grinned mischievously. "I was thinking of talking to him. While I distract him with small talk, you walk around. Just in the corner of his eye. And when he sees you, I'll sneak off on his blind side. If this works, he'll come over to you and when he does, ignore him. Pretend you can't hear him at all. Then I'll come up from behind and ask who has talking to while you get away." 

"This might make him want to stop drinking or think he's going crazy." Onyvr smirked. "Here we go."

*****

"What is going on?" Yelled Bull in frustration. His large hands gripped at his head. "Krem! Did I hit my head or something? I'm going mad. I think I need a lie down." He said dejectedly.

Melokia and Onyvr snorted with laughter from their hiding spot. Melokia had had the good sense to steal off with Bull's axe before he did something stupid. 

"That was great," Onyvr wheezed out between laughs. "Did you see the way his eye started twitching when I ignored him?" Onyvr didn't want to admit that he was having a blast. He had to get in on his twin's pranks more often. "Who next?"

Melokia wiped tears from her eyes. "How about Blackwall? Sera probably heard the commotion. We would be outed if we tried her next. Blackwall will be in the barn. This time, you go through the servant doors and I'll walk down through the courtyard." Stifling their giggles,the siblings went their different ways to go and annoy the Warden. 

*****

Blackwall was easy to trick. All Melokia had to do was keep him talking long enough for Onyvr to steal off with the Griffon rocking horse he was making. Melokia had a hard time keeping a straight face when she spotted her brother riding said rocking horse next to the stables. When Blackwall glanced away to what what was keeping the Inquisitor's attention, Melokia bolted for cover. Blackwall's confused expression was evident when he spotted Onyvr rocking away. The bewildered Warden took a double take. Long enough for Onyvr to hide himself with a vanishing spell. Suddenly, Blackwall was standing there alone, watching the Griffon toy slowly stop moving.

"I need a drink. This place is too weird sometimes." 

Melokia and Onyvr heard Blackwall say, as he stomped away from the stables.

"You're going to send all your followers insane, dear sister." Onyvr laughed. His face was starting hurt from the constant smiling.

"Nah. It'll keep them on their toes." She replied with a smile. "Your turn to pick. Make it a good one."

"It's time to go visit your darling Commander. I'm sure he could use the distraction from all the work he does." 

*****

Onyvr crept into Cullen's office, trying to keep as quiet as possible. Unfortunately for him, all of the doors in the tower creak. The Commander looked up from his work with a frown. It quickly turned into a smile when he spotted Onyvr.

"Thank goodness. I've been wanting to see you all day." Cullen rose from his seat and made his way over to the Inquisitor's twin. He backed Onyvr up against the heavy door, trapping him there with his arms.

"Uh oh. This isn't going the way I had planned." Thought Onyvr. He tried to back away from the man but found he had nowhere to go. As Cullen leaned down to try and capture his lips, there was a knock on the door. 

"Go away." Cullen called out.

"Why is the door locked, ma'vehan?" Melokia asked.

"What?" Cullen's eyes widened in shock as he stared down at the Inquisitor's look alike. Onyvr used this distraction to duck under the Commander's arm and pull the door open. Melokia walked into the office as the Commander looked between the two of them.

"Well that didn't work out the way I was hoping it would," Onyvr shook his head. "You have your hands full with this one, sister, he was quite eager to see you. So much so, I was almost tempted to steal one of your kisses."

Melokia laughed loudly at her love's angry face. "Relax ma'vehan. I would never let you give away my kisses. I'm the jealous type." She said as she wrapped her arms around Cullen's waist. "I'm guessing the disguises work then. It was Josephine's idea."

"Yes. She had mentioned trying that. They do work very well," Cullen begrudgingly agreed. "But don't ever play that trick on me again." He turned to whisper what he had planned to do in Melokia's slender ear. Onyvr watched in amusement at how red her face got at Cullen's suggestive whispers. Melokia turned to press her lips against Cullen's in promise. 

"Don't forget those. I'll be back tonight to take you up on that." She bit his lower lip teasingly as she pulled away from him. 

"I want to see if it works on Dorian."Melokia said cheekily as she beckoned Onyvr to follow her to the library.

Cullen watched as the twins left his office. "That woman is going to be the death of me" He muttered to himself.

*****  
Melokia waited in the doorway to the library as Onyvr made his way over to his lover. She covered her mouth with her hand so she wouldn't give herself away from with her laugh. Melokia watched as Onyvr took a seat on the armrest of Dorian's favourite chair. Without missing a beat, Dorian wrapped his arms around Onyvr and pulled him down into a very heated kiss. 

"What the hell?" Melokia called out from her hiding place. She stomped her way over to the kissing couple. Onyvr wasn't even trying to stay in character as he submitted willingly to Dorian's attention. 

Dorian broke away from the kiss and grinned up at Melokia. "Good afternoon Inquisitor. Pray tell. Why do you have my amatus dressed up as you? Granted you are very attractive but I prefer my amatus without the fake breasts." 

Onyvr, still lying in Dorian's lap, smiled up at him. "How did you know it was me?"

"That's easy. Your magic feels different to Melokia's. I can always tell."

Melokia had forgotten that each mage's magic was unique. She huffed in defeat as she leaned against the bookcase. "That's no fun. Guess we can't do this on any mages that know about you then."  
Just then, a messenger showed up with a letter. Opening it, Melokia quickly read it and smiled. "Your request will be here in a week Onyvr."

"That's wonderful. I can't wait to see It." Onyvr said cheerfully.


End file.
